amalgamated thoughts!!!

amalgamated thoughts!!!!
While I sat in the amphi this evening…
Random thoughts were rolling in my mind..
Circled by friends around…I was there!!!
Countless voices…I could hear………
.But…I didn’t care.
Many called out my name………
…But….I didn’t reply.
My body was there…but soul absent…

Thousand thoughts fought to entered my ears
But…heart searched silence….!!!
Lips struggled to speak out..
But ,.brain didn’t permit..
This happened first time in my life.
That i was neither a spectator,nor a performer.
I m a chatterbox…..today I wasn’t
Not a single word I uttered.
I m a patient listener…..
today I wasn’t
Plugged my ears…
Not even a giggle I made
On a funny joke cracked..

Amongst hundred other frens
I felt as a single soul..
Lonely!!!!!.....all alone
Strange went my behaviour.
.For my fellows
I was shook hard…questioned..”wats wrong”
Even they couldn’t get me out
Of these feelings holding me strong.In such a state,

I went
CONFUSED!CONFUSED!CONFUSED!

Although for a short span lasted this illusion.
Lead to a lot of pain and confusion.
AMONGST those amalgamated thoughts
One thing struck me hard
Cant recall them fully
Just got faint traces.

Sadness I hid behind my..smiles
Things I bottled up deep down in my heart
Might be, were seeking escape.
Somewhere within me is an area.
Which wants to speak,
Speak out emotions…share.
But,itz true all volcanoes don’t erupt
Suppressed do exist….

I don’t wanna erupt
I don’t wanna suppress
I wanna xpress…
Un expected thoughts haunting my mind

I M IN CONFUSION or I M LOST??
I shall call it both…


……………..rUcHi